I did an intensive curse in coaching NLP with Cătălin ZAHARIA – inspirational model in structured communication, for me; and top speaker – Get a result now!.

This evening I was reminded about an exercise I did with him. He was talking and making the participants talk to the younger them.

And I communicated, in my thoughts, with Olivian I was at 3-4 years old. And that feeling was so intense. And remembering the exercise this evening was also intense, although this exercise only kept the format (making me think about things).

It was one of the most intense pleasures I’ve felt. Talking to me, when I was little.

I repeat – life is unfairly good. There’s too much good. Too much. Unfairly much amount of goodness.

And tonight I was remembered of this.

“I don’t do change”.

Essence of life – one doesn’t do change. It may inspire it, provoke it, ignite it. Not actually do it.

“We cannot do great things on this Earth, only small things with great love.” – Mother TERESA (Mother Teresa quotes; Mother Teresa – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)

It’s an important distinction: change, great things, huge accomplishments take a lot of things. But what I can do is small things. With love, as mother TERESA puts it.

Another project; we meet; we put up a plan; plan takes longer than expected; meet again; discuss, talk; “Name?” “Logo?” “Motto?”; we work on this; time passes; we talk more, we focus on these; time passes, things finally start to move, but then they’re dumped down; nobody cares anymore about anything; enthusiasm goes down; people would meet for hours for more than one month, but they’ll fail to implement pretty much anything; again, the solution for revival – more meetings;

I’m tired.

Below you’ll find my notes, photos and a video I made, and, finally, other reactions.

A. My notes

(note on my notes – they’re not 100% exact quotes)

Cabral IBACKA (cabral.ro)

- It’s useful not only to broadcast, but to know, to really know your audience;
- You should never stop learning new things;
- You can learn a lot from a personal experience;
- In only you may get used to not listen, and thus start making mistakes;
- A lot of people are not used to argument a critical thought;
- After receiving a critical thought, we may be afraid of an argument;
- Prediction – real communication will be made in small circles;
- In one-to-may communication the feedback disappears;

Christen KROGH (Opera: Speakers corner)

- In 1400′s you could have read everything that was written in your area of living prior to this time;
- The Internet connects & changes us;
- One third of world’s population has Internet access – there is a huge potential for growth;

Vlad PETREANU (Amar de Zi — un blog de Vlad Petreanu)

- Prediction: Google TV (or systems similar to it) will spread wider in the following years;
- Prediction: the public chooses, consciously or not, the truth, sooner or later;

Alex BRIE (alexbrie.net – Home)

- If you want to make money online, applications for Apple’s App Store, Nokia Store, Android Store are a good start;
- You can also create applications for tablets, not only smartphones;

B. Photos and a video

Photos (full-screen option):


Ivan PATZAICHIN presents stories from his career, at Webstock 11:

C. Other online reactions

• Multumesc pentru Webstock 2011 | M A N A F U *
• Castigatorii #Webstock11 | iYli
• Webstock 2011 » blog of zoso
• Şi a fost Webstock 2011 « Denisa Bârgău
• Webstock 2011– Câștigători și din culise
• Webstock 2011 | Blog de Bucuresti
• Webstock 2011 « pr intre randuri
• Bani din blog: Este blogul meu un produs in care brandurile/agentiile ar fi dispuse sa bage bani? | refresh.ro
• Don #Webstock11 – the evenimentfather « « Spada

__________
Bottom line: very nice event, lots of things to learn.

• a. What you do because you have to (you need to eat, thus you need money, thus you need to work, thus you need to have a job, thus you need to act in certain ways);
• b. What you do just because you want to (decide to go out for a run, play a game);

Are there counter examples? Praying should be slow; eating should be done slower; some sports require relaxation, rather than intense concentration; doing things fast can lead to mistakes.

But, overall, I consider that a fast & intense life is the way to go.

• If you don’t plan to, you don’t get smarter as you age – how can I prove this? In my opinion, most people in age are not necessarily smarter at 40 than they were at 20; sure, they are better at some things, but, overall they may not be smarter; or, to put it another way, not much smarter; I personally don’t see this in life – “People at 40 at smarter than people at 20″; sure, they are better with some skills, but not necessarily much smarter;
• If you plan to, you can get smarter – how can I prove this? A lot of people that are smart now have gone through an intended process (read the things they planned, had the experiences they planned, went through life with a plan);

Example – it’s been said:

“What does not destroy me, makes me strong. [Or, What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.].” Friedrich NIETZSCHE

Most people look at this and say – “Hmm, if it doesn’t kill me, it makes me better, right?”; well, not necessarily; let’s say someone upsets you; you can get better (learn how to cope with stress, learn what to do, learn to put differences aside, learn how to listen to the person, improve on the very thing that person has said about you), or you can get less than better (have negative thoughts, become critical, not care at all about other people, learn to ignore everything others say about you); we’re made into thinking positively – “Things will be better”; yes, most of the time, but not always and not necessarily;

This blog post’s message is simple – most people can’t grow their IQ – you’re born with it; but you can increase your ability to take IQ tests, by some methods (like practicing for this kind of tests); in a similar manner, you don’t just get smarter by accident or chance; but if you have a plan and stick with it (I want to be better at thinking, so I read about thinking; I want to have better social skills, so I go out more), you may improve your life, in the aspects you chose;

Conclusion? Live your life by design if you want to improve it; read / go out / have some experiences / watch some movies; but don’t think that by living (and nothing else) you’ll get better at stuff; narrow your choices (I want to be better at X, so I will do the following: A, B, C);

P.S.: Personal impressions only, not necessarily life rules; you may follow my ideas or not.

What’s wrong with this picture?

• If you badmouth your others (in this case, the competition), you badmouth yourself; don’t speak bad about others; ever; you do yourself a poor service;
• It’s fine to speak bad about your own problems; “yes, I admit, I have a poor memory”; if you present solutions to this, it’s even better; “I tend to fix this by becoming organizing-maniac”;

How about having a critical eye? Yes, it’s fine to look with a critical eye on others, and on yourself; but it’s best, in my opinion, to be able to stop it; don’t go in someone else’s house and focus on the kitsch Romanian-style items; try to see other things also, not solely the bad things in others; if you can get out of the critical eye, you’re safe.

Be free. (I think this is the very first emoticon in a blog post on this blog; quite a change; it was about time)

The test goes like this:

Pick a fruit from the ones below:
- A banana;
- An apple;
- A strawberry;
- A grape;
- An orange.

The results of the test:
- If you have picked a banana – you are a person who likes bananas;
- If you have picked an apple – you are a person who likes apples;
- If you have picked a strawberry – you are a person who likes strawberries;
- If you have picked a grape – you are a person who likes grapes;
- If you have picked an orange – you are a person who likes oranges.

Are you ready for the essence of life, as picked from the test above? The essence of life is when you can pick a fruit and the person can tell you the result. So, if you pick an orange, the person doing the test may say “you are a person who likes oranges”, but this won’t be necessarily true. More than this, it can’t say this either: “you are a person who doesn’t like oranges”. Have you picked an orange? OK, this doesn’t mean you have an emotional or physical attachment to oranges, be this attachment positive (I like it), or negative (I hate it).

This is the essence of life – your total freedom in picking something, unbiased from the past, without any fears and restrains, with no pleasure and no pain. Total freedom.

2010.05.01: Walk 15 minutes at Pîrjol, walk 40 minutes in Neamț county, bicycle for 5 minutes

2010.05.02: Walk 15 minutes at Pîrjol

2010.05.03: M Obor – M Piața Sudului – walk 15 minutes – M Piața Sudului – M Universitate – walk 30 minutes – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.04: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – M Titan – walk 30 minutes – M Titan – M Timpuri noi – walk 40 minutes – M Timpuri noi – M Unirii – M Universitate – walk 10 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.05: magnetic bycicle – 39min, 15.32km, 349kcal

2010.05.06: M Piața Sudului – M Aviatorilor – walk 100 minutes – M Victoriei – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.07: M Piața Sudului – M Aviatorilor – walk 50 minutes – by car 2 minutes – walk 45 minutes – M Aviatorilor – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.08: M Piața Sudului – M Aviatorilor – walk 60 minutes – M Aviatorilor – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.09: walk 10 minutes

2010.05.10: Jogging for 15 minutes
M Piața Sudului – M Victoriei – M Ștefan cel Mare – walk 30 minutes – M Ștefan cel Mare – M Victoriei – M Universitate – walk 30 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.11: No exercises

2010.05.12: Jogging for 15 minutes
M Piața Sudului – M Universitate – walk 5 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.13: Run for 15 minutes while doing this:
M Piața Sudului – M Aviatorilor – walk for 35 minutes – M Aviatorilor – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.14: M Piața Sudului – M Romană – walk for 10 minutes – M Romană – M Universitate – bodybuilding for 70 minutes – walk for 30 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.15: M Piața Sudului – M Universitate – walk for 10 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.16: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – walk for 10 minutes – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.17: M Piața Sudului – M Victoriei – walk for 20 minutes – M Victoriei – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.18: No exercises

2010.05.19: M Piața Sudului – M Aviatorilor – walk & run for 35 minutes – M Aviatorilor – M Romană – walk for 10 minutes – M Romană – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.20: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – M Titan – walk for 25 minutes – M Titan – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului
M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – M Timpuri Noi – walk for 20 minutes – M Timpuri Noi – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.21: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – walk for 40 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.22: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – walk for 15 minutes – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.23: walk for 20 minutes

2010.05.24: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – M Eroilor – walk for 10 minutes – M Eroilor – M Unirii – walk & run for 60 minutes – M Unirii – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.25: M Piața Sudului – M Universitate – walk for 30 minutes – M Unirii – M Romană – walk for 15 minutes – M Romană – M Universitate – walk for 10 minutes – M Universitate – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.26: M Piața Sudului – M Universitate – walk for 40 minutes – M Unirii -  M Romană – walk for 15 minutes – M Romană – M Piața Sudului

2010.05.27: M Piața Sudului – M Unirii – walk for 30 minutes – tram home

2010.05.28: no exercises

2010.05.29: no exercises

2010.05.30: walk for 45 minutes

2010.05.31: no exercises

First of all, have a look at the picture below:

Basically, the most common thoughts when seeing two different patterns of thinking colliding are this: thinking that we (or the others) are great, thinking that we (or, again, the others) are bad, of being neutral on the whole thing.

As you see, there are three feelings we can have both about others, and about ourselves. Let’s analyze all six possibilities.

A. How do we feel about ourselves?
a. If we think that we are right, this is great for the psychology; Great ego, great pride, great feelings, yahoo! We’re over the world; One problem though: you may see you so good compared to others, that you may feel like crushing them; It’s also poor on developing oneself (why would you need to improve on perfection?); But it is a very optimistic way of seeing things, and it’s good for the spirit;
b. If we are indifferent to ourselves, we can’t improve; But we do have this option: not to care; What’s the advantage of this? We do have a pretty good ego, a stable way of seeing things, rather calm; All-in-all, not that bad;
c. Let’s say we have bad feelings about ourselves; This might lead to some problems like depression, or bad feelings on ourselves; It might also lead into progress, so all is not lost; I like this view a lot on the development issue, although it’s not that great on morale;

B. How do we feel about the others?
a. If we think that others are great, we have two options; First is to try and copy them, in order to improve ourselves to be as good as them; This is not just admiring them, it is also copying their behavior; You want to be like them; The other option you have is to just feel great about the others, and try to spend time with them in order to feel good as long as possible; But most of the time one feels the urge to improve by looking at his models;
b. We can be neutral about others; This will lead to no progress, but this will also lead to no bad thoughts, like envy; This is quite comforting zone;
c. We may think that the others are wrong; One would express that the others are wrong usually by gossiping, talking from behind (not saying things to one’s face); The alternative, being plain rude and telling people that they are wrong, is not much better either; Why is thinking about others as doing bad things faulty? I think there are plenty of reasons even from highly skilled persons in this world to acknowledge that there are persons better than themselves; So, most of all it’s illogically to think that there are only bad people in this world; Anyhow, seeing the bad things in other gives you bad mental processes and doesn’t really help you improve (what can you learn from others like that?);

How do these combine?
a. If you see others doing bad things and you doing good things, there’s no way you can improve, but you might have a very good personal feeling;
b. If you see no need for improvement in either you or others, and you also have no feelings on the good things in others, you will be calm, no problems, but you will still not improve;
c. Finally, if you see the bad things within you and the good things within others, you have room for improvement; Although this might be stressful, this is the method I like most.

Yes, there are more mixes than that. You can feel good about yourself on some things, and bad on others. You can be indifferent to others or care too much about someone else. You can think badly on two persons and great on other four. Life is more complex than that, I acknowledge that.

Most of the improvements in life come from seeing others doing great, or that we don’t do well. Usually this is solved by trying to imitate the world or trying to change ourselves.

If you see bad things in others and good things in yourself, your mood might be great, but your need for improvement will be lacking some resource.

But, all in all, we do have an option on how to live our lives, and even if we are not always right, even if others aren’t always right, we do need to acknowledge that:
a. a progress can be a great way to improve (see the good in others, the bad in you);
b. a happy feeling can exist if you see others doing bad things and you doing good things (but this will have no improvement);
c. you may also wish to be indifferent.

I hope I’ve cleared some ideas in you.

Some pictures at the event:

What insights did this event brought me?
1. God defines Himself: “I am who I am”; You can learn something out of this and say a similar thing: “I behave in the way in which I choose to behave”;
2. Life deserves to be lived;
3. A way in which to discover things about meanings of life:
a. Ask yourself “What would be the greatest choice right now?”
b. Ask “Do I follow my own path in life?”
c. Pose yourself this question: “Do I know what helps me?” (in this area there are multiple answers on three levels – to exist, to do, to have);
d. Ask “Do I recognize the signs of my path?”;
4. Out of any thing that goes into your life you can learn something, and that thing brings up new opportunities;
5. There are four levels in which you can perceive the world:
a. You; (blame others)
b. I; (it’s all me)
c. We; (it’s all us)
d. ”I am who I am” (spiritual level);
The farther away from “You”, the better;
6. Meditation on your workplace? Think about it!

What did you learn out of this?

1. I need quite a few money if I ever decide to go to Navodari
This may seem like a no-brainer, but for me it was not obvious that I needed quite a few money to go to Navodari (I now live in Bucharest, for almost 8 years). What will the money bring? Safety, a net which can catch me if I fall.

The alternative is simple: be so good as a professional, that I can’t possibly fail in anything I do in the online area from Navodari.

Both requirements are quite tricky. What’s important to know is that I need either a financial stability for a few years or be a great professional;

What are my actions for this?
a. Try to earn more money; This should be simple; All I have to do is continue doing what I do now that brings me money and, hopefully, to be able to save more money; No dead-line imposed, but a general objective;
b. Try to improve myself; This includes (and is not limited to) write better in English (the purpose of this blog), be a better professional at Search Engine Optimization (the purpose of GetSeoIdeas.com blog), be more productive (the goal at work); Having a portfolio of clients and improving my online networking skills should also help; I should be physically fit;

2. Focus on the positive things in life
I was talking to my friend (old mate, used to live in the same room, along with two other guys while a student in 2002-2003) about our common past. What I’ve noticed about the past:
a. Oh, those time were great; Lovely times, beautiful life, great friendships; (It’s also a sign that people tend to remember only good memories in the past – see this article: “We Don’t Remember the Bad Stuff So Well”);
b. During that time, I focused on a few bad things;
c. Focusing on those bad things didn’t bring any obvious advantage.

Come to think about it, I’ve had a great life, but I focused on some bad things (and this focus didn’t bring me value).

Now I looked at today’s life. There are two aspects:
a. Life;
b. Work.

I think I have a great life, and a wonderful work. Sure, there are things to improve, but the bottom line is that my life and job are very close to being perfect.

What will I win if I focus on the negative thing? Aside frustration, not too many things can be changed easily.

What will I win by focusing on the positive things? “Oh, what a beautiful life! Oh, what a beautiful job!”

There are some things to keep a close eye on (I seem a little brain-dead), but, all-in-all, it’s a pretty neat way of thinking.

What will my actions be on this?
a. Try to emphasis positive things in life;
b. Capture the moment; Smile, laugh if you have to, but, oh!, be so happy;
c. Only focus on negative things if you can make your life better.

PS: I’ll look at this blog post years from now and I’ll probably thank myself for good ideas. But why not start thanking myself right now?

On 13th of February I was reading “The Brothers Karamazov” (by Fyodor Dostoyevsky) and one thing hit me: addiction can’t be fought by trying to fulfill it. You just live with it, it never stop if you try to satisfy your desire.

I once had a feeling that solving an addiction is a simple thing: one just tries to solve it, forces things (imposes, sets a goal), and it goes away. And when addiction comes back, and you really want that thing, the solution is to try to solve that one moment (since you are already out of addiction). This will make things better (I thouhgt), and in the long term you won’t feel the urge anymore

Well, I was wrong. Addiction will always make you have an urge. (or at least me) The solution to solving the urge is simple: keep the urge. Don’t try to satisfy it. This is totally unlike me: I have a tendency to solve a problem by making things worse. I know, it feels bad, you really want that thing, but living with the urge and not satisfy it is the best thing to do.

So, as a personal observation to my urges, it seems I can’t solve an addiction by stepping into it.

I just felt like sharing this with the world.